ERUPTING NEWS !!!

A call from Mr Strauss-Kahn, now former Head of the IMF and indicted for rape, has appeared in a standard recording in an evaluation to improve service at the Sofitel Hotel in San Francisco. The San Francisco Comical has gained access to a copy of said recording, and below is an inofficial transcript of what is being said on tape.

(phone rings)

Good evening, this is Anna at the San Francisco Sofitel Reception, how may I help you?

'Allo 'allo, this is monsieur Dominix in sweet ... eh ... suite 666.

Hello, what can I do for you, Sir?

Well, you can do me ... eh ... do for me this, I think I need some hoovering in my ryym!

I see, Sir, and you would like me to send up a chambermaid to help you?

O yes! ... eh ... But I would like the special chambermaid, the very special chambermaid!

I'm sorry, Sir, I don't quite follow?

Ah, I would like the chambermaid with the strong hook ... eh ... hoover ...

Come again, please?

O yes! I mean the chambermaid with the strongest suction!

O, you would like the SPECIAL chambermaid because you need an expecially strong hoovering?

Yes, yes, yes!

Alright Sir, try to be patient, and I'll find her as soon as possible and send her up to take care of you.

Aaaaaahhhhhhh ..... thank you! Tell me, Anna, do you 'ave a daughter and do you sometimes take her out?

I'm afraid that's private, Sir. Have a pleasant evening.

My evening will be extremely pleasant if I can have your chambermaid soon!

Okay Sir, I understand and will help you off … eh ... out. Good night, Sir!

Ah .... Thank you two very very much!

(phone down)

The San Francisco Comical Supervisory Editor would like to remind the readers that his is only an approximate account of the conversation an that it has been retrieved from anonymous sources.

(c) Claus Piculell, 8th July, 2011